Attorney General Jeff “King Keebler” Sessions announced Friday that he’s going to assist in the this Milli-Vanilli-ass administration’s attempts to stop leaks from the department and intelligence community to the media.
“I have this message for our friends in the intelligence community. The Department of Justice is open for business and I have, this morning, this warning: Don’t do it,” Sessions said, Huffington Post reports. “For the past several months we have made changes and are seriously ramping up our efforts.”
Sessions also added that the Department of Justice is reviewing a policy on media subpoenas, which sounds about right in this draconian-ass administration.
“We respect the important role the press plays and will give them respect, but they cannot place lives at risk with impunity,” he said. “We must balance their role with protecting our national security and the lives of those who serve in the intelligence community, the armed forces and all law-abiding Americans.”
“This nation must end this culture of leaks,” he went on. “We will investigate and seek to bring criminals to justice. We will not allow rogue anonymous sources with security clearances to sell out our country.”
I get it, King Keebler is trying to do everything to get back in President Shitty Von DoucheFace’s good graces. Since the leaks began, Von DoucheFace has been adamant to stop them, basically the leaks are proving that he’s a liar who doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing.
“I want the attorney general to be much tougher,” Trump said last week, the Huffington Post reports. “I want the leaks from intelligence agencies, which are leaking like rarely have they ever leaked before, at a very important level. These are intelligence agencies we cannot have that happen.”
“The attorney general’s intent to revisit the [Justice Department press subpoena] guidelines is deeply troubling as is the frame he put around it today ― that reporters are putting lives at risk,” Bruce Brown, the executive director of the Reporters Committee, said in a statement. “Journalists and news organizations have a long history of handling this information in a responsible way, working with government officials to evaluate potential harms, and taking steps to mitigate any damage when there is an overwhelming public interest in revealing it.”
Let’s hope that King Keebler can find some other business like baking cookies in goddamn tree and stop worrying himself about the good leakers who are trying to keep America safe.
Read more at Huffington Post.
