By Alma Gill (NNPA News Wire Columnist)
Dear Alma,
A couple of months ago a real friendly woman moved into the condo across the hall. She and I hit it off right away. We went shopping and to lunch together. We even went to a music concert and had a real fun time, or so I thought. All of a sudden, she just stopped calling, texting, visiting and really just being my friend. I donโt know what happen. We still speak. Sheโll give me a big wave across the parking lot or when I see her in the hall, she seems generally glad to see me, but we just donโt hang out anymore. Iโm not sure what happened. I really like her and I want to be her friend. What do you think I should do to get her to talk to me and hang out again?
Signed,
Lost My Running Buddy
Dear Lost My Running Buddy,
Well, hmmm Sugar Plum, did you do something to piss her off or hurt her feelings? Could you possibly have said something that was a bit harsh? Maybe you gave your opinion on a particular subject that didnโt sit well with her. Or, could it be, she just donโt like you?
Have you ever started a new friendship and partway down the loop you think, โyou know what, I donโt really like this person all that much?โ Usually it takes a run around the romper room to learn the true personality of a person. Most folks start out sane and with good intentions, spoon feeding you whatโs whole and wholesome about them. They seem to be on the up and up, until, Lord have mercy, six months later, here she comes outta nowhere, drowning in red wine, Missy Super Rachet. Youโre totally blindsided like when you innocently pick up a hitchhiker who has an ax, or a hatchet, LOL, I couldnโt resist. This woman could be Lucy Looneybird relocating from Louisiana, you donโt know.
Anyhow, let it go. Evidently, yaโll ainโt got the same flow! You canโt make somebody like you nor should you try. If she decided you were not someone sheโd like to add to her friends list, so be it, trust her judgment. She knows herself better than you and sheโs had time to peep your hold card. Trust me when I say youโre all the better for it. Itโs best to find out up front whoโs not friend material, than to waste time cooking in a frying pan of foolishness. Great friendships that are worthwhile grow like a beautiful wisteria vine, you couldnโt stop it if you tried, nor would you want to.
Alma Gillโs newsroom experience spans more than 25 years, including various roles at USA Today, Newsday and the Washington Post. Email questions to: alwaysaskalma@gmail.com. Follow her on Facebook at โAsk Almaโ and Twitter @almaaskalma.
